the huberistic process of naming

I have decided that there is a special circle of hell for parents-to-be trying to come up with suitable names for their unborn cylon(s), and the more name combos you have to come up with the lower the circle you are trapped in.

It’s such a perilous business because we all have a different definition of what is a ‘good’ name: traditional, non-traditional (which let’s face it are now common place enough to be thought of as traditional), surnames as first names, any old noun or free styling. One parent’s ‘Harper Seven’ is another parent’s ‘Aleph’ (I think Posh won that one).

As a dyslexic I veer away from free styling and funky spellings because they are a minefield, and at the back of my mind I am thinking “Does President [REDACTED] have a ring to it?”. Though living in the age of Obama anything goes right? Well, as long as it works well enough to get you into Harvard or Yale.

Like everyone going through this process we have a criteria for what makes a suitable name (or does not everyone come up with branding guidelines?). We want to stay away from the odd (sorry no Starbuck and Apollo, or Romulus and Remus, or Demeter and Persephone), cutesy twin pairings, the familial, Asian (or faux Asian) and anything beginning with an ‘H’.

After pouring over umpteen name websites and reading 3 years worth of blog posts from the Baby Name Wizard; I thought I’d come up with a pretty solid list only to have 95% of them met with an eye roll or a wince.

It was like the ewok massacre at the end of Return of the Jedi. My suggestions were being brutally shot down by the storm trooper at the end of the sofa, and by the end I felt like I had a pile of furry carcasses bleeding at my feet.

We’ve been through the ewok massacre a few times, and between my approved suggestions and Alex’s our long list is kinda on the short side but as Alex pointed out last night we only need a couple of really good names. But, these names have to be so good they beat all other names in the whole universe.

I can’t look at any more name websites so I am going to await for inspiration to strike, and to continue calling out the names of TV characters as we watch them in the evening (sadly Supernatural was a washout).

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Louise Meiklejohn
    Jul 17, 2011 @ 17:21:45

    Leah, There was a copy of ‘Cassell’s Dictionary of Firstnames’ on sale in our library for 50p so I bought it for you on spec. I was going to put it in the mail but I can’t find your address…..

    Like

    Reply

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